For couples with children at any age it’s difficult to find the time to reconnect with each other. Young children need constant supervision and as they get older their lives become busier as well. When children start participating in more activities parents find themselves spending most of their lives driving kids around, cheering them on, or getting them ready for the next activity. It becomes even more difficult with two or more children as one parent usually ends up taking one child to their activity, while the other parent goes with the other child. With work commitments added to the mix parents can easily go weeks without spending any quality time together. This can put stress on even the strongest marriages.

To maintain a strong relationship couples should schedule date nights, even if it can only be done once a month. Nights out, or in, without the children or other distractions are important for adults. Dates are also a great way to break the routine and to get couples out of a rut. They can bring the spark back into a relationship and remind couples why they got together in the first place.

Dating your spouse is different from dating someone you’ve just met. You already know a lot about each other but that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t plan a date where you can talk and catch up. It may have been a while since you’ve had the chance to have a heart to heart, so take this time to learn more about your partner as things may have changed since the last talk.

Share different experiences. If one partner likes to cycle then plan an afternoon bike ride together and pack a picnic lunch. Show that you are interested in doing what your partner likes to do. It will bring you closer together to share in these experiences.

Dates don’t have to be expensive either, and they don’t always have to be in the evening. If your kids are in school, daycare or are involved in weekend activities, plan your dates during those times. You’ll save money by not having to pay for a babysitter. Another option is to ask a friend or neighbour to watch your kids while you go out. Instead of payment offer to return the favour for them sometime.

Take turns planning your dates. This takes the pressure of making a joint decision and avoids the common “what do you want to do?” conversation. It will also ensure that you have a different experience each time. Keep your date a secret as well. Surprises can be fun and add spice to your life. Try to keep the activity a secret until you get to your date location.

Finally, try something new. Something that neither of you have done before. Trying new things is a great way to bond with your partner and to learn more about them and even about yourself.